connie madden

A Sacred Time




The Mother lies dying
Surrounded much of her waking hours
By loving family; two caregivers or more.
She may pass any day;
It may happen months from now.
It is wondrous and awful.

Meanwhile, in the town where the boys
Grew up, La La Land, maker
Of bold dreams and great Nuclear Power Plants,
The Father went to the ICU
And died on the gurney
Waiting to be told there was nothing
Anyone could do for him anymore.
He was 97 and a half joined by wife and son;
Peaceful ending, really.
Living on borrowed time many years.

The extended family is called on the phone;
Immediate family gathered at the Mom’s house
To eat an odd assortment of snacks we’ll refer
To as Wake Dinner
And hug and cry a little and talk much,
Mostly of what we are now about.

What are fond memories held of Dad?
First ride in a small airplane at nineteen
for Pat, a plane that did loop the loops!
Swept away by this handsome dude/engineer
Who she stuck by 32 years, designed, built
And ran The Home, filled with baked goods
And gave birth to three sons.

So what is sacred in all this activity?
Perhaps to see the objects we own are
Moot; they have no voice, though we assign them meaning
Perhaps it is a Family and Friends kind of trust
We commit to - that we will treat
Each other with respect and kindness
And make sure whatever care can go
To the Mother will be given,
Even when that means giving up
Resuscitation in favor of comfort,
Giving up the fight for loving repose;
Being the best,
Most respectful family
We can manage together.

But what of passing itself?
In a book, Light on Aging and Dying;
I shall dance! Says a dying woman;
I see Indians! Says Thoreau.
For each it is a different story.
For Fred did it just grow dark?
For Pat it seems illuminated.
Like the brilliant rainbow through her window
Nearly the moment that Fred passed.

Then, at ten oh ten this evening,
I engaged Granddaughter Annabella as
Her new baby brother, Terran Wulf,
Emerged from her Mama’s womb,
Suckled firmly on Marina’s breast
And told us of his miraculous journey.

Big sister Bella, not quite 2, zoomed in,
Kissed her Mama’s hand and
Gestured for Daddy to kiss it, too, and
Delighted that this tiny “new kitty” is going
Home to live with them, she fell asleep.

Connie Madden 2014